Yesterday I went to the equity chorus call for the Broadway musical Shrek and I got there an hour early! Go Me! But I was still number #86 on the non-equity list. I take my seat in the waiting area and the boys, who auditioned earlier in the day, begin filtering in all sweaty from their audition and it quickly becomes known that they are not keeping anyone after the first round and that means they are not really looking for anyone as they have no openings.
How is it that they are having auditions when they don't need any dancers? Well, being an equity employer all Broadway shows are required to hold auditions twice a year, regardless of whether they have any openings or not. AWESOME......its like going through interviews for a new job, several of them, only to be told at the end that they like you but they don't have the headcount to hire you.
Now after hearing this news, I began to contemplate leaving as there were 150+ girls there and since I get seen last I'd be waiting for hours. However, I had nothing to do anyways so I decided to wait. After waiting four hours....thats right FOUR hours, I finally get to go in and learn the combination which is a little snippet of the Duloc Number starring Lord Farquaad himself. The number was very character specific. Given that Lord Farquaad is an ego maniac, we the citizens of his town were expected to perform in these great musical numbers he wanted, however, we were terrified of being dismembered if we messed up. So we were supposed to have forced smiles with a look of fear in our eyes. It was ridiculously hard to do.
Now on the opposite side of things the dancing itself was....eehh. Insanely easy and definitely not for a dancer dancer. I could tell immediately that this was not the kind of show I would want to be doing 6 days a week. Nonetheless I put on my best forced smile and go out and perform for the choreographers. But like I thought, they don't make any cuts they just thank everyone for their time and we are free to go.
So am I glad that I wasted a whole day for nothing? Yes and no. On one hand I'm sure there was something more productive I could have been doing, but the other side of it is that I now know for sure, that I would not want to be in Shrek ever! Yay for revelations!
Over and out.....National Tour of Hairspray on Friday!